The Facts: Sexual Assault and Consent

STATISTICS IN CANADA

• Women are five times more likely than men to experience sexual assault

• Sexual assault rates are higher among 15 to 24 year olds (103 per 1,000) and 25 to 34 year olds (50 per 1,000) than any other age group

• Women with a disability are sexually assaulted at a high rate with 94 incidents of sexual assault for every 1,000 women with a disability, which is over four times higher than that among women without a disability (22 per 1,000)

• Young women ages 15-24 are five times more likely than women 25 years and older to be sexually assaulted, three times more likely to be physically assaulted and psychologically abused by an intimate partner

• Only 5% of sexual assaults are reported to the police

• Most sexual assault survivors choose not to report to or have limited success with the justice system, making the prevalence of sexual assault even higher than what is recorded

WHAT IS SEXUAL ASSAULT?

Sexual assault is any unwanted sexual act or acts done by a person or persons to another without that person's consent or voluntary agreement through the use of force, fear, or coercion. It can result in or include:

• minor physical injuries or no injuries to the victim

• bodily harm resulting in wounding, maiming, disfiguring, or endangering the victim

• the threat of bodily harm to the victim or others

•the use or the threat of a weapon or an imitation of a weapon

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I. SEXUAL ASSAULT: MYTHS VS. REALITY

MYTH: Intimacy is owed to those who give material goods (e.g., food, entertainment, school/job opportunities), relationships, or feel that they have been “led on” or believe they “have the right” to use the other person’s body.

REALITY: Intimacy is not a transaction in exchange for goods or relationships. No one is obligated to fulfill another's desires at the expense of their boundaries or feelings.

MYTH: It is not sexual assault if your romantic partner (e.g., date, spouse) forces you. It's only sexual assault if the perpetrator is a stranger.

REALITY: Any nonconsensual sex is sexual assault, regardless if the perpetrator is a non-stranger or stranger.

MYTH: Sexual assault is the result of uncontrollable passion or desire for someone.

REALITY: Sexual assault is a choice by the perpetrator to assert power over someone through sexual violence and humiliation.

MYTH: Saying “no” actually means “yes”, “convince me" or a sign that someone is “playing hard to get.”

REALITY: "No" means no. It is a complete sentence, not the start of a negotiation.

MYTH: A person's age, appearance, dating history, prior intimate contact, silence, passivity, and an unconscious, or compromised state (whether or not due to alcohol or drugs), are valid signals that a person consents.

REALITY: A person's age, physical appearance, dating history, silence, passivity, prior intimate contact, and an unconscious, or compromised state, ARE NOT signs of consent. Consensual contact requires both parties to communicate a clear "yes" without the use of coercion or threats.

MYTH: If a person changes their mind at any point during the sexual activity, even after consenting, it can be continued.

REALITY: New boundaries must be respected even if they are made after consenting to the initial contact.

MYTH: It is not sexual assault if both or either one person involved was drunk or high.

REALITY: Being drunk or high is not an excuse for actions leading to sexual assault.

MYTH: If a survivor is aroused during, then it was not sexual assault.

REALITY: Feelings of arousal or climaxing are non-voluntary, uncontrollable bodily responses; it does not mean that forced or coerced sexual activity was consensual.

MYTH: If a survivor does not have physical injuries (e.g., cuts, bruises), then the incident is less serious or not sexual assault.

REALITY: The perpetrator can use nonviolent, coercive methods such as threats or assault the target when incapacitated, which may not leave physical marks. Lack of physical injury or resistance does not mean sexual assault did not occur or that it is "less traumatizing."

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II. WHAT IS CONSENT?

Consent is the voluntary agreement to engage in sexual activity based on what the person thought and felt at the time. Sexual contact is consensual if the person affirmatively communicates their consent through words, while silence, passivity, or agreement achieved through coercion or threats do not equal consent. An unconscious person, a person incapacitated due to alcohol or drugs, or an underage person is unable to give consent.

If you are unsure about whether you have consent, you don’t. The absence of “no” or some form of protestation does not mean “yes”, nor is it the beginning of a negotiation. There is no consent if any of these signs are expressed by you, your partner (or anyone attempting to engage in intimacy with another person):

• VERBAL COMMUNICATION (OR LACK THEREOF)

  A partner who does not consent is likely silent or says something that reflects their refusal or hesitation:

  • “Stop”/ “No”

  • “Maybe”

  • “Get off me”

  • “Let’s do something else”

  • “I don’t like that”/ “This doesn’t feel right”

  • “I’m not sure”/ “I’m not really down”

• BODY LANGUAGE

  Actions speak louder than words. There is no consent if a partner shows any of the following signs of discomfort or lack of consciousness:

  • Crying

  • Being rigid

  • Squirming

  • Pulling/pushing away

  • Trying to put or keep clothes on

  • Looking scared or sad

  • Being drunk or under the influence of a drug:

  • Slurred speech

  • Swaying, stumbling, staggering

  • Looking sleepy

  • Passing out

  • Unable to understand what’s going on

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DUE TO THE COMPLICATIONS AND RISK OF GREATER VIOLENCE AND ABUSE, TRAINED PROFESSIONAL ASSISTANCE MAY BE REQUIRED. FOR MORE INFORMATION, PLEASE PROCEED TO SUPPORT SERVICES.

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“It’s not consent if you make me afraid to say ‘NO.’”

• References

  • Canadian Centre for Justice and Community Safety Statistics. “Criminal Victimization in Canada, 2019.” Statistics Canada. August 2021.

  • Canadian Women’s Foundation. "The Facts about Gender-Based Violence." June 2022.

  •Cristall, Jonathan. “What They Don’t Teach Teens: Life Safety Skills for Teens and the Adults Who Care for Them.” Quill Driver Books. 2020.

  • Warshaw, Robin. "I Never Called it Rape." Harper Perennial. 2019.

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