Understanding Violence
I. KINDS OF VIOLENCE
Regardless of how one comes in contact with violence, it is important to acknowledge that violence is a universal tool that anyone can use, whether to destroy or protect. Unfortunately, so long as you live and interact with other human beings, experiencing violence is still a possibility. Preparing for a problem requires understanding it so let’s dive in.
There are many ways in which violence can occur, they can be narrowed down into two categories, which differ in their motivations and their nature:
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Antisocial violence is conflict that erupts from competition for property, social dominance or status. Antisocial offenders are generally driven by various factors ranging from mental health, insecurity, impaired judgment, to lack of self-control. The use of antisocial violence generally has limits, and includes a clear motive or connection to their victims or targets.
e.g. Antisocial violence is any violence that stems from a competition for dominance, to prove who is “right”, “better”, or “stronger", this is usually triggered by hostile communication and/or misunderstandings (e.g. bar fights, road rage). Robberies are antisocial in that the perpetrator is competing for their target’s resources (vehicle, money, jewelry) by taking them with force or the threat of violence.
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Asocial violence is conflict that erupts from a perpetrator’s desire to indiscriminately harm for violence’ sake. Asocial offenders are generally driven by various factors ranging from mental health, impulsive aggression, desire for notoriety, and lack of empathy. The use of asocial violence has no limits and does not require any clear motive or connection to their victims or targets.
e.g., Mass shootings and serial killings are asocial in that they stem from the predators’ desire to harm victims. Asocial predators hunt, they do not see their targets as competition for status or resources but simply as prey for their own amusement.
Knowing the difference between antisocial and asocial violence is essential because the prevention and response strategies are different: antisocial violence is avoidable through verbal de-escalation and avoidance, whereas asocial violence is survivable if the target manages to escape or incapacitate the perpetrator.
Despite these differences, the consequences of both can be similar. Although antisocial violence can be de-escalated with non-confrontational strategies (e.g., backing away, remaining calm, giving the robber what they demand without complaint), there is still a risk that an aggressor will resort to violence and a target may need to defend themselves. In cases where combatants of antisocial violence do not mean to cause permanent damage, there is still a risk that violence can lead to severe harm. This brings us to the next section, which addresses the levels of aggression a person (whether a predator or target) are capable of using.
II. LEVELS OF AGGRESSION
As there are different motivations for using violence, there are also different levels of aggression:
NICE: unwilling to use verbal or physical aggression
MANIPULATIVE: willing to use verbal aggression/coercion, to control or disempower
ASSERTIVE: willing to use verbal aggression to stop or deter an aggressor or manipulator
AGGRESSIVE: willing to escalate from verbal aggression to physical aggression
ASSAULTIVE: willing to use harmful physical aggression with limits
LETHAL: willing to use deadly physical aggression without limits
Everyone has their own baseline or range of aggression and most people are comfortable to stay within them. This has consequences when you compare the levels in which people operate in different kinds of situations. Going down levels is easier than going up: many predators are capable of all levels and can easily transition from being manipulative to lethal (as they sometimes need to lure a target before the attack). The same is true for a person who is trained to be assaultive; as they have the option to use aggression to defend against physical violence, use manipulation to de-escalate verbal conflict or be a nice, harmless person around those they love. In contrast, a person whose only level is nice, may have difficulty being assertive or assaultive to stop a violent perpetrator.
III. MARTIAL ARTS ≠ REAL-LIFE ASSAULTS
When it comes to addressing real-life violence, many people turn to learning martial arts. While some martial arts techniques are used in self-defense training, martial arts competition IS NOT the same as real-life assaults. This is not to say that martial arts is ineffective, but if it is taught solely in the context of sport, and ignores the context of real-life assaults, then it can be misleading.
Martial arts competitions (and training drills) are done between consenting highly trained athletes, following the same rules (e.g., punches only in boxing, no strikes to the back of the head), under similar weight classes, and with the supervision of coaches, referees, judges, medical staff, and security who can intervene if a match becomes too dangerous for one athlete. On the other hand, real-life violence bears none of these safety measures, with the assailant choosing the method and duration of violence to control and harm the unwilling target. The unpredictability around real-life assaults will shock anyone, even martial artists who are only familiar with combat in a controlled setting like the gym or the ring. During a real-life assault, a target's survival is dependent on their ability to handle and adapt to the following potential, uncontrollable stressors:
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Predators choose the time, place and method of their assault. Surprise attacks from the blindside (behind or from the side) are used to disarm the target, as squaring off with them from the front (like in martial arts training) will only allow the target to orient themselves to the attack or buy time to escape. The violence of an attacker will feel more dangerous and thrown at a faster, more frequent rate as most of their energy is spent on causing damage and not on defending against a target.
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Predators go after targets who are alone, unarmed, smaller, weaker and who they perceive to be incapable of resisting. Some predators initiate attacks as a group or are joined by passersby (e.g., students watching a schoolyard beatdown, or protestors at a riot). Meanwhile, martial arts competitions are only between two highly-trained individuals. Even if there is a contrast in build and height with athletes, they generally possess the same level of aggression and willingness to engage when competing.
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Attacks can start from the standing position, and then move to the ground. There is also a difference in the end goal when perpetrators (generally men) attacking other men compared to how they attack women. Male on male violence usually starts and ends in stand-up striking. On the other hand, male perpetrators force female targets to the ground for sexual assault. If the target manages to escape, the attacker/s may pursue them. In contrast, martial arts competitions and training are confined within limited spaces (e.g., boxing ring) and under time limits (e.g., 3 min rounds).
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Aside from their attacker, targets have to be especially aware of their surroundings too. Depending on the location in which the attack occurs, there are possible threats that can cause intentional or accidental harm, such as people and objects (e.g., tripping over rocks in a forest, running into traffic at an intersection to escape a stalker). On the other hand, combat sports rings and training facilities are controlled settings cleared of obstacles to minimize accidents.
“If you know the enemy and yourself,
you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.
If you know yourself but not the enemy,
for every victory gained, you will also suffer a defeat.
If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”
S U N T Z U
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• de Becker, Gavin. "The Gift of Fear." Dell Publishing. 1998.
• Fields, R. Douglas. "Why We Snap: Understanding the Rage Circuit in Your Brain." Penguin Random House LLC. 2015.
• Kiehl, Kent A. "The Psychopath Whisperer: The Science of Those Without Conscience." Crown Publishers. 2014.
• Larkin, Tim. "Survive the Unthinkable: A Total Guide to Women's Self-Protection." Rodale Books. 2013.
—-. "When Violence is the Answer.” Back Bay Books. 2017.
• Miller, Rory. "Meditations on Violence." YMAA Publishing Centre. 2008.
—-. "Facing Violence." YMAA Publishing Centre. 2011.
—-. “Conflict Communication: A New Paradigm in Conscious Communication.” YMAA Publishing Centre. 2015.
