My Why
The fear or experience of real-life violence brings many people to learn martial arts. I am no exception. When I was seven years old, I escaped an assault attempt by a male friend the same age as me. He invited me to play an “adult game,” which he described would involve undressing me and wrestling on his bed. Even at a young age, I sensed danger and immediately left before he could convince or physically force me to do what he wanted.
Despite my experience, I delayed learning martial arts for a decade. I spent years in denial, telling myself, "It would never happen again." As I grew older into adulthood, I had to face reality. I was lucky to escape another seven-year-old's assault attempt when I was seven years old, but how would I survive against adults more willing and capable of greater harm? Not only did I have to wrestle with that possibility, but I also became aware of the experiences of people around me: a classmate stalked by older students, a friend assaulted by her date, a co-worker living with an abusive partner and a relative robbed at knifepoint as some of many real stories. If it happened to them, it could happen to me. After high school, I turned to martial arts to address my physical and mental vulnerability.
Regardless of the style, martial arts is a means of forecasting violence and preparing for it. Many martial art gyms prioritize teaching techniques to win competitions. But very few students compete; most just want to feel confident and be safe in their daily lives. A good school will teach the difference between fighting in the context of competition and life because preparing for a match is not the same as avoiding or escaping an assault. Self-defense education is necessary, and while learning martial art techniques is important, more is needed to understand the social dynamics of real-life violence and abuse that women and girls face. This blog series is meant to fill in the gaps.
Although this blog series is presented in sequence to provide a cohesive framework, I encourage you to read it in any order you like. Certain sections may be more relevant to you than others; take what you need and what is most valuable to you. I hope that the information presented equips you with the tools to protect yourself and others, so you can have the freedom to live your life to the fullest.
-Kru Kat Velasquez
“Women and girls have been bamboozled into believing that they don’t have a warrior within. She’s there, she’s strong and she’s ready to protect you if you give her a chance.”
E L L E N S N O R T L A N D
